The training from hell ate up my morning, and recovering from it (read: bitching) took up the next two hours.
Essentially, we learned nothing — we had to count off by fours and be arranged in groups. (Note to self: stop sitting with friends when you arrive.) The trainer is a dumb bitch who is friends with Frosty, and she was spotted reporting to Frosty the activities from our time with her — time she spent watching us as we did our group work.
I rather enjoyed my group. (Miracle of miracles.) I was nominated to be the silent observer, facilitator and spokesperson, so I had lots of notes that I chose not to share with the larger group. Ah, but not to worry — I got my zingers in. I just asked someone else to read my notes aloud. 😉
Although I was supposed to be silent, I noted that they seemed to me to view this as an exercise in futility (’cause that’s what I felt). They opened up immediately and stated that they were reluctant to participate, due to a general distrust of the activity as well as what would (or, more likely, would not) happen with any information shared. They said they knew it was only an exercise, but there was no point to it. They also said they were kind of intimidated/uncomfortable, because we all know the trainer is Frosty’s best friend, and even though the Upper McManagement wasn’t included in the trainings, we know nothing is a secret.
Once this was established, everyone suddenly got with the program and decided to do the exercise how they wanted to, not how they thought the “instructor” would want it. God, that woman was worthless. Didn’t do anything to tie the exercises together (we were given a tray with construction paper, copy paper, pipe cleaners, tape, scissors and straws, and we were to build something out of it with no clear objective as to what the fuck we were wasting our day there for). Didn’t tell us how to apply teamwork to our jobs. Didn’t say anything memorable.
I did break my silence to suggest using the pipe cleaner to hang ourselves or maybe make some construction-paper characters we could bring to an untimely demise in the same manner, and they realized that even though I work all the damn time and speak to no one but my friends, I’m actually not horrible to be forced to sit with!
Oh, but that fucking trainer watched me fill out my evaluation — do I just emanate “troublemaker”? It was two pages — I was so busy spewing vitriol on the first page that I decided I didn’t have the energy for the second page. I rated her as a “2? as a trainer, being that she didn’t, oh, TALK or teach us anything. There was a question on “What tools did you acquire that could help you better in your job?” I answered, “Pipe cleaners.” LOL
The evaluation asked what we learned. I said I was shocked to find that people here really do have ideas and motivation and can solve problems creatively when asked.
I tried to misspell a bunch of words, but the way Dumb Bitch was watching me (I was practically ripping holes in the paper because I was pounding out my words. No wonder I have carpal tunnel) and saw how much I bled blue ink on my paper. I don’t care — I don’t have to impress her, because she got paid for her work and sure as hell didn’t impress any of us.
Goody, now I get to stay late an extra five hours while the rest of these idiots go skipping home early. But maybe the day wasn’t so futile after all — I actually realized how smart some of these take-it-easy (insofar as working a full day) types actually are. I learned maybe we should be giving them real challenges. Too bad I’m the only one in the building who seems to share that sentiment.