Caterwauling

I just made a wish on a green M&M.

Do you still do that?

On iTunes: Liz Phair, “Polyester Bride”

Mentally, I am at a place where I was shortly before I left my last job. Now, mind you, I have no intentions on leaving anytime soon (read: no prospects), but something in me kind of snapped this afternoon. Nothing in particular happened — just a realization that I may be immobile and confined to a nursing home in 30 years. That means I have three decades left in which to truly live. And am I living now, missing car and loan payments and robbing from Peter to pay Paul? That if I want to go out for dinner, then there goes part of the cable bill? That good intentions are punishable by meetings? That someday I’ll be lying apt like a fucking tilted turtle and won’t be able to get back on my feet again for good?

There are several areas at the Veggie Patch in which I’ve been begging for more responsibility. A staff member is trying to see that I get those jobs. I almost laughed, because she’s presenting her case to the same folks who shoot it down every time. Their excuse is that I can’t handle what I’ve already got. What they don’t know is that I do handle more than they know and that it’s the random, rare detail that catches their attention that is my undoing in their eyes.

I’m not afraid of the big, bad meeting. Yet my lunch doesn’t know in which direction it wishes to lurch, but it’s headed somewhere and it ain’t gonna be pretty. 🙁

I don’t know. I should be working. I’m swamped. But that’s somehow when I find the most time to blog. 😉

On iTunes: Jane Siberry, “Hush”

Big pow-wow scheduled with Cruise Director on shit that went wrong with the paper last month. The meeting will occur, of course, after the new issue goes to bed. I look forward to being able to say, “We fixed what was wrong.” I, however, know that will be punctuated with, “Oh, by the way, different shit went wrong this time.” LOL.

I’ve been awake since 3 a.m. and am wired for sound. Damn kitten kept me up (as usual) because it’s fun to break shit all night in my bedroom.

On iTunes: Melissa Ferrick, “Drive”

While we’re on the subject of the movie “About Last Night” and sexy songs, I need to add an update:

On iTunes: k.d. lang, “Consequences of Falling”

Angie and I had a culturally inappropriate conversation today, based on my wish to find a hot European man. I was telling her how tiresome it is to continually be hit on by people I would never find attractive — that I studied French and want to learn Italian because those are the cultures that appeal to me aesthetically (and they’re quite the romance languages). I was joking that I keep waiting for some hot Italian semen seaman to sail up the Potomac River on his gondola, and if he’s looking for someplace to park his boat, I pointed to my crotch and said, “Here’s your port of call, right here, baby.”

She swore I must have said that before; it came out too quickly. I really hadn’t, but I said it sounded like a blog entry in the making.

So there you have it. 🙂

On iTunes: Jane Siberry, “The Life is the Red Wagon”

I am not going to talk about the article I mentioned in the last entry, but I do have to laugh. Angie asked me for an e-mail I had from an interviewee who wanted to talk about people who survive torture. So I ran a search for “torture” in my e-mail box, and within a second, 17 different e-mails appeared from Shan, Scot and Princess Fatass. Seems torture is a hot topic ’round here — enough to be in our daily vernacular! Maybe I should write the story about surviving torture — I do it every day!

On iTunes: Tobey Lightman, “Devils and Angels”

Got a freelance story (that I didn’t commission) from someone who used to work at my very magazine. I see that years in journalism did nothing for her copy-editing and accuracy abilities — I am on paragraph three and have been on the Internet four times to verify facts and names. Painful, yes. Typical of a columnist, not a journalist, though. My head aches.

But how am I supposed to read past this paragraph? (Note: everything changed to protect the criminally insane.)

When asked if there is a connection between (happiness) and (taking a shit), (Lardass) leaves no room for doubt. “Absolutely,” he says, empathically.

I count five things wrong. In one fucking sentence.

In her e-mail containing the story, she remarked on something that drove her “bazurk.” No, I do not make this shit up!

And people wonder why I’m on the verge of going postal.

On iTunes: Pulp, “Like a Friend”

Inspired by Lachlan and Erica, who have sexy songlists of their own to share, I present the official “in the mood” songs of the Caterwauling hacienda. What makes your drawers get all sticky and sweet?

Although some songs are stolen from these sexy ladies, the tunes that invoke my passion are:

Shije, “Ooh Baby La La La”

Lili Haydn, “Come Here”

Melissa Ferrick, “Drive”

Beth Orton, “Stars All Seem to Weep”

Lucinda Williams, “Essence”

Leonard Cohen, “In My Secret Life”

Lisa Hall, “Is This Real?”

Sinead Lohan, “Don’t I Know”

P.J. Harvey, “The Wind”

Jessica Riddle, “I Want You”

Dido, “Who Makes You Feel”

BT, “Force of Gravity”

Tracy Chapman, “Baby Can I Hold You”

Bonnie Raitt, “You”

Sheilla Nichols, “Elevator”

Melissa Etheridge, “You Can Sleep While I Drive”

Paula Cole, “Feelin’ Love”

Bruce Springsteen, “Thunder Road”

U2, “All I Want Is You”

Sarah McLachlan, “Elsewhere”

Tool, “Schism”

War, “Low Rider”

Whitesnake, “Slow An’ Easy”

Bulletboys, “Smooth Up In Ya”

Jane Siberry, “Love is Everything”

John Mellencamp, “Ain’t Even Done With the Night”

k.d. lang, “Constant Craving”

Kylie Minogue, “Slow (Chemical Brothers remix)”

Madonna, “What It Feels Like For A Girl (Above & Beyond 12″ Club Mix)”

Nina Gordon, “Tonight and the Rest of My Life”

Ivan Neville, “Why Can’t I Fall In Love”

Sophie B. Hawkins, “Damn, I Wish I Was Your Lover” (I have a great live version with Melissa Etheridge. Yowza!”

Honorable mentions:

Jane Siberry, “Life Is the Red Wagon,” although it reminds me more of my friendship with Shan than anything salacious. 🙂

Shannon, “Give Me Tonight,” just because I hooked up with someone at a club and that song was on. Still gives me chills.

I can share the lovin’ upon request. 😉

On iTunes: Tara Maclean, “You”

I went to the park and played on the swingset today. Totally clears my head every time I do it, not to mention it’s fun to swing so high I clear the top of the swingset.

Anyway, there was a little kid on the next swing, and her mother was pushing her and playfully spanking her butt every time she came back. I was kind of jealous — it’s been awhile since I’ve had a good spanking! 😉

Three posts in a day from me — what is the world coming to? I think blogging should be a career; then again, I’m sure I’d find some way to rebel because that seems to be my lot in life. 🙂

On iTunes: Sinead Lohan, “Don’t I Know”

On iTunes: Peter Gabriel (Featuring Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan), “Passion”