Caterwauling

Maddie.jpg

Originally uploaded by dcwriterdawn.

Why yes, I DO have a Flickr account. And one of these days, I’ll actually put more than a handful of photos in it. So, subscribe to my feed if you wish, and add me as a friend or whatever so I can see your life through your photo albums too. 🙂

Forgive me for quoting TV’s “Butthead,” but I spent the weekend in a posh little town in the Colorado Rockies. And to say that sometimes life drags you straight to rock bottom, but it also restores you to better than where you were before — even so far as catapulting you to the top of the mountain — is an understatement. But a pleasant one. 🙂

I’ll keep it brief, as I should have gotten home 19 hours ago but had the joy of being grounded at the airport for several hours there and then by the time I got to my layover in Minnescrota, I missed my connection to D.C. and had to spend the night at a Holiday Inn in the Twin Cities at the “distressed passenger” rate.

Worse, though — I spent the night five minutes from the Mall of America and didn’t get to go. *waah!* Bastards — they rescheduled my Sunday night flight to 10:25 a.m. today (and it left at 10:45, but at this point, what’s another 20 minutes when you’re already a DAY late?!?!) — you don’t get to pick your new return flight. 🙁

In any event, (while in Colorado) I took tons of photos, which I hope will turn out. I also supplemented them with camera phone shots, which blow but hey, who gives a shit? Because, as I can now say, “Well, yes, I jetted over to Aspen for the weekend. …” 😉

MY FAVORITE PHOTO

This is of one of the four hot tubs in the courtyard of my hotel. No, I wasn’t in it *drat* — it was a mere 30 degrees that night, which the locals said was warm!

A VIEW FROM THE BOTTOM OF THE MOUNTAIN

A funny story goes with this one. I heard that those of us not brave enough to strap on a pair of skis could ride to the top of the mountain and admire the town.

So, I bought my ticket for what they called a “gondola” ride (the gondola being the enclosed cabin that takes you to the peak, which these folks are in line for), got up to said point where I snapped the photo, and freaked the hell out. Holy heights! I wasn’t even so scared of the ascent as much as the descent, so I figured I’d save the medics the trouble of trying to revive my potentially cold, rotting carcass. They very nicely refunded my ticket price.

For once in my life, I don’t mind so much the view from the bottom.

A VIEW FROM MY ROOM AT DAYBREAK

That’s an ice rink over there to the far right, although the streets in town themselves doubled for one, as merchants only de-iced their storefronts and left the parking lots/curbs more treacherous than the slopes themselves.

I’m a prissy girl — I wear DRESS BOOTS, not SNOW BOOTS — these particular boots are NOT made for walking!!! And a gal in my hotel in Minneapolis complimented my footwear, so that made it all worthwhile. 😉

WHERE I SPENT MOST OF MY FREE TIME

When I wasn’t taking baby steps through the cobblestone walkways of town, I hung out at this fireplace in the lobby. It’s impossible to tell, but the fire is a-cracklin’ and every order from the bar comes with a complimentary wrought-iron and glass serving dish full of dried cranberries, mixed nuts and wasabi peas. I took a journal and wrote my widdle heart out here.

I can only hope that the photos from my $25 disposable camera (bought on-site in a Starwood hotel. Go figure. They sell at Wal-Mart for a third of that) of the skyline turn out better. Because I never saw a sky so blue as the one in Colorado (well, before that six inches of snow dumped exactly five minutes after I arrived at the airport that accumulated in four hours — before that, the tarmac was DRY).

In any event, lots more stories to tell, but I’m slightly exhausted — yet deliriously happy. I guess I’m living proof that, if you put up with enough suckage in life, the moments of reward are magnificent. 😉

I’m happy to report that my commenting function is back (yay Tiff for calling it that by blacklisting one single solitary thing in the comments queue, absolutely everyone else got silenced). So, make some noise, if you’re so inclined — I’ve missed you!

But what I’m thrilled about is that I’m packing to go to the airport right now on some super top-secret (not really) mission that includes fresh air, high altitudes and a $200 facial. And no, not that kind. 😉 Although, as one of my friends put it, for that kind of money, there’d better be SOME sort of happy ending. *wink wink, nudge nudge*

In any event, I’m also happy to be breaking in my new suitcase (a $300 wonder that I got for $109. Yay J.C. Penney!), but this is one of those moments in which I wished it didn’t require so much material per item of clothing to cover my ass so that I could possibly pack more. 🙂

Till we meet again, here’s some (I think) appropriate tunage:

Sara Evans, “Born to Fly”

OK, how the hell do comments break on a weblog? Seriously? Thanks for the e-mails — I didn’t realize anybody was reading this crap.

I tried changing the template to see if it would be restored, but nothin’. If there are any guardian angels out there who can take a shot at it (and no, I haven’t upgraded to WordPress 2.0), then I’ll be your friend for life. Unless you don’t want me as a friend. So then I will stalk you instead. 😉

Anyway, I was thinking more about the idiosyncrasies post, and I have yet another to submit, as weirdness is a way of life.

What happens is that I feel stress and anxiety from every angle right now, and that’s OK — it’s the story of my life. But how I react to it is very diametric, depending on the situation and who’s around. Several of you who know me know that I can shut down and not breathe a word — I can smile like nothing’s wrong and I can make you believe I’m suzy goddamned sunshine. But then there are other days that I just want to stomp and shout and go assault a dartboard with mental pictures planted squarely in the bullseye.

It’s weird, really. If you tell me a secret, I will keep it till the day I die. But there’s something inherently wonky in my wiring that prohibits me from truly squelching what’s bothering me. I mean, I try to swear and rant and snark and just plain bleed the wound so that the poison is no longer in my body. And sometimes, it really works.

But more often than not, all I want is just one single solitary person to whom I can rant absolutely uncensored. I don’t want to worry that it will be held against me at a later date and time. I don’t want anyone to think me difficult and unpleasant and, well, NOT easygoing. Because I try to be, but it’s those things that I really AM squelching that start to rear their ugly heads in other ways that impact my demeanor and my choice of words and my inability to fully reign in my emotions and maybe even actions.

The comedian Chris Rock had a great take on that insofar as dating — he said that you (as “you”) can’t show up to a date — you send your representative, ’cause no one would ever want you as you are. The older I get, the more experiences I’ve had in which people prefer the quiet, smiling, agreeable version of myself that really doesn’t exist. The passionate, opinionated, restless one always bubbles to the surface eventually, but going back to my earlier point, it’s likely because I don’t really tell anybody the full story about anything.

We have a saying in my line of work that perception is greater than reality. Applied to humans, I guess we distort our own realities so much that we don’t even remember sometimes who we started out trying to be. And for me, a victorious day is one that ends with generating the hype but not always believing it. A truly wonderful day, however, ends with someone else understanding exactly why you feel the way you felt — and loving you anyway.

Princess Cat tagged me about a thousand years ago to get me to share five idiosyncracies. It’s taken me this long to figure them out because how the hell was I to know that I’m not normal?!?! 😉

1. Down escalators freak me the fuck out. I mean, holy vertigo issues. I don’t mind heights (I rather love them, actually) and I have no problem ascending, but descents drive me nuts. Given the choice, I will ALWAYS take the stairs instead.

2. Fashion nonsense is the name of the game in my world — I must feel dressed up and yet dressed down at all times.

I have a serious, psychotic adoration of denim and would wear it to work if it wouldn’t make the baby Jesus cry. But beyond that, I insist on dressing up when I’m wearing jeans (trendy shirts, shoes, blazers are a MUST, along with great jewelry). The weird part? I prefer to wear sneakers with suits. It’s complete and utter rebellion, to look classier in jeans than I do in a suit. I figure, I stuffed my ass into a pair of pantyhose — what more do people want from me? 😉

3. Singing with a Southern drawl — for the record, I cannot sing, but when I’m belting out tunes at top volume in the car, I somehow sound like a (talentless) country singer. The hell?

4. Indifference, even if only on the surface — This is less a quirk than a deficiency, but I am the person who stops hugging first, who walks away without a single glance over my shoulder, who kicks and claws for air even though that might be the very last thing on earth that I want to do. Not to say I won’t intellectualize it to death after the fact, but I have a very, very hard time being affectionate with people, and I won’t do it if I don’t mean it — and, so far in my life, I probably won’t succumb to it even if I do.

5. BUT … I can be affectionate with strangers. How odd is that? I might cozy up to people I don’t know and tell them my life story or pat their hands and hug them and playfully whack them if they say something funny. Take me to a happy hour and get me talking (that’s the hard part — getting me to open my mouth and not manage to insert a shoe or two), and it’s like all the pent-up thoughts and emotions exit at once. Just as long as I don’t have to see those people again, ever, or at least anytime soon.

And we wonder why I don’t have many offline friends. 😉

Reader Poll Monday returns!

1. How did you ring in 2006?
I awakened at 12:02 a.m. to my voice mail chiming from my best friend Shan, who’s three time zones behind me. I called my Mom first and then called Shan back (as the latter call went on for HOURS). So, I welcomed the new year by talking to the people I love most on this earth — not too shabby.

2. How did you ring in 2000?
I was probably drunk — my friend Steve used to throw the BEST parties. Although I might have spent it with my family that year. Seriously, life in my 20s was a total blur!

3. So far, which has been your favorite way to ring in a new year?
Drunk. And with friends. I love being the party hostess, though — I don’t drink nearly enough if I’m not at home. I used to like going out dancing and trying to find a cab to take us to an all-night diner afterward. Although, in my 20s, those kinds of nights were called Thursdays, Fridays and Saturdays. Ah, memories. …

4. Do you usually make resolutions?
I don’t make them with the intent of waking up the next morning and implementing them. I do a lot of, “By this time next year, I will have accomplished (fill in the blank).” A bunch of us tried to quit smoking one year, so we smoked two full packs each at the New Year’s party. And then we kept smoking after midnight, so there went THAT resolution that year!

5. If not, why? If so, do you keep them?
I found that I keep them if I trudge through January (and truly shake off the *ick* of the previous year) and then start fresh on Feb. 1. I always start a diet that day. Which means I can have lots of carbs and other miscellanous junk until then!

6. Do you do anything superstitious at the stroke of midnight?
I make a wish. Always, always, always.

And I don’t do this anymore, but my great-grandmother always had us in the habit of putting shiny silver quarters outside for when the clock struck midnight — and you were never to spend those coins that year, because they were sort of like your good-luck charm. But now that quarters = laundry money, I can’t keep them intact when I need fresh scandalous undies. 😉

7. Did you know that we were all given an extra leap second this year? Did you use it wisely?
I got an extra second of sleep. Whee.

8. Do you have any new year’s day traditions?
Tradition went out the window this year. My grandmother always insisted that we have pork and sauerkraut for luck. I refuse to do laundry or cleaning — something about an old wives’ tale that you’ll spend your whole year cleaning up messes (your own or others’). And hoo boy, I’ve seen it happen, so I don’t lift a finger anymore!

9. What are you most looking forward to this year?
My mom, in her infinite psychic wisdom, swears that February is going to bring a HUGE change in my life. Here’s to hoping it’s a positive one — so I guess I’m looking forward to that, whatever it is.

I’m looking forward to scraping up enough money to visit my friend Shan and to find a new apartment. I’ve not had to do my (long) commute to work in more than a week, and while it’s not a terrible drive, I certainly didn’t miss it.

It’s going to be a year of making long-awaited dreams come true, I promise you that.

10. Ask me something.
Think you’ll ever make it to San Francisco (to live), or are you happy in NYC for the time being?

I never blog about work because I, oh, like having an income. (Especially after that pesky incident in 2004 in which we found that employers REALLY don’t like it when you blog about them. No matter how much they might have deserved it.) 😉

But I have to break my vow of silence to share with you what a fucking idiot I can be sometimes. Because today was a SHINING example.

I was asked to attend a very important workshop in a VERY chi-chi part of the country. I also very last-minute booked the hotel which, to my horror, was about three times the cost that I’d budgeted for. Yikes!

So, I had to suck it up and only stay for two nights instead of three. Because I had to leave room on the ol’ credit card to allow for that little thing known as FLYING there.

I fired up my trusty discount sites and was appalled to find that not only could I NOT get a nighttime flight on my hotel checkout day (I’d figured I could haul my suitcase through my sessions with me and jet home after the fact), but the cost was QUADRUPLE what I’d planned on. Oh, yeah, and all the return flights left in the morning, so I didn’t want to leave before the end.

So I, in my infinite wisdom, booked a one-way flight across the country. Because it was all I could afford. And that way, I didn’t have to leave at all! (*slaps forehead, in lieu of finding a gun to just blow out brains*)

After not sleeping very well last night after doing this atrocity (and hereby blowing my credit limit by a freaking mile!), I hung my head and went to my publisher today to ask for help. I did give him the option, though, that without a return flight, I could easily stay until the end of the workshop. 🙂

He graciously saved me and picked up the tab for my return flight.

The thing is, if I’d had any fucking brains at all (I will not tell you my IQ. You would never believe it anyway!), I would’ve booked the three nights at the hotel that I’d originally needed and I would have asked for the company to cover my roundtrip flight. But that required WAY too much thought — I figured, it was more important that I get there than that I come home. I know, ingenious! Hah.

In any event, I regret to say it will be a whirlwind trip, but at least I will be able to come home from it. 😉

Welcome to the first Carnival of the Recipes for 2006! (Well, it was technically supposed to be the last one for 2005, but I have no concept of meeting deadlines. I am also a journalist. Go figure!) 😉

Before we begin, I wanted to make the place look festive for company. And thus, I’m sharing my recipe for Pretzel Wreaths, as my mom and I used to make these together a hundred years ago, and now they’re something I do to feel close to Mom even though she’s 250 miles away. These are great to give away in festive little baggies to neighbors and colleagues.

Pretzel Wreaths

You’ll need:

Mini pretzels
Almond bark
Heavy whipping cream
Long, thin strands of cherry licorice

I prefer to use a fondue pot to melt the almond bark (you can use it at the dining room table, as opposed to a double boiler on the stove, where you have to stand while you assemble). I also insist on almond bark — I used white chocolate pieces this year and am disappointed in the consistency.

Use the occasional drop or two of heavy whipping cream and a whisk to ensure the bark stays smooth. If it gets lumpy, add a drop of vegetable oil and whisk away.

What you’ll do is use two layers of pretzels — I like to use six in each row. Arrange them on waxed paper with the tops of the pretzels touching but not overlapping. Dip the top halves in the bark and return to the waxed paper.

Repeat with a second row of pretzels, only this time alternate the positioning (i.e., the top row of pretzels should span two pretzels on the bottom). While the bark is still soft, use red and green sprinkles to decorate your wreath.

Finally, take licorice (I love the cherry Pull ‘n Peel Twizzlers) and thread through the ends of the pretzels. For this size wreath, I used three strands — two for threading and one to attach a licorice bow to the top of the wreath.

TIME FOR CINDERELLA TO BE ON HER WAY TO THE BALL

In any event, I was thinking about the holiday season and realized that you just can’t have it without circles like wreaths, and also balls. (Get your minds out of the gutter, people!)

But think about it — we make tons of cookies and appetizers and side dishes, and everything starts as a lovely, one-inch circle before it bakes up all bubbly and chewy and tasty. We put glass balls on our Christmas trees. Even mistletoe comes in a ball (although the sprig is prettier, but you get the idea).

And let’s not forget the most important ball of all — the one we eagerly await to signify the proverbial “out with the old, in with the new” — the New Year’s Eve ball! (OK, so it’s an apple — more on apples later. …)

So, without further ado, I invite you to kick off your party shoes, grab an eggnog and have a — you guessed it — ball with these scrumptious recipes submitted by our various chefs in honor of the occasion!

Let the countdown begin …

APPETIZERS AND SIDES

As traditional as lighting candles and buying presents, most everyone looks forward to having Cocktail Meatballs, which kicks off our list, courtesy of Nic over at Shoes, Ships and Sealing Wax. She gives away the “secret sauce” that always stuns people when they find out that it only has two ingredients. 🙂

Beth, who’s also online here, gives us a variation on the theme — she uses cranberry sauce instead of the grape jelly:

Sweet and Sour Meatballs

Meatballs
1 can jellied cranberry sauce
1 bottle chili sauce

Heat together, dump in cooked meatballs (I really cheat and buy the precooked frozen meatballs) and heat together.

From someone who knows how much I love this particular cooking category, we get Meatballs a la Victor over at Publius & Co. Mmm, spinach.

In Mad about Meatballs, Riannan gives us another variation on meatballs — this reminds me of my grandmother’s recipe, because the beef broth really pumps up the flavor.

Personally, I can’t wait to try Tiff and Tom’s lamb meatballs in a tomato-curry sauce. Yum!

Not everyone eats meat or, if we’re all resolving to eat more healthily in the new year, a good place to start is with Spaghetti and Mock Meatballs, contributed by my buddy Bill, who keeps those healthy resolutions through tasty dishes like this.

Be still, my heart — Savory Cheese Truffles from Everything and Nothing. Seriously, cheese — who doesn’t love a recipe with cheese?

Coon (Procyon lotor) Balls from KeeWee’s Corner. The name intrigued me — it sounded like something out of a Smithsonian exhibit at first. But sausage fans rejoice — it’s a recipe you’ll love!

Like it a little less spicy? Silver Blue’s Sausage Balls will hit the spot instead. John’s spicy enough without the hot sauce. 😉

Not into sausage or ground beef? Try salmon, courtesy of Beth:

Salmonettes

1 15 ounce can salmon
1 whole egg
1 heaping teaspoon baking powder
� cup flour

Drain salmon reserving juice. Combine drained salmon, egg, and mix with fork. Add flour and mix. Add salt to taste. Measure out � cup salmon juice and discard the rest. Add the baking powder to the juice and beat with fork until it foams. Mix into salmon. Roll into small balls and deep fry.

Meat and chocolate are the main staples of Caterwauling, so recipes for Holiday Meat and Chocolate Balls from Martin are a perfect addition to the list!

Several of you have asked me for my mom’s world-famous Stuffing Balls, for which friends and relatives from all over will drop by the house after stuffing themselves silly at their OWN dinners to snack on because yes, they’re THAT GOOD!

Mom’s Stuffing Balls

Celery (mince ’em up well)
Onions (mince ’em up well)
1 loaf fresh bread (Mom uses bakery bread; I prefer Italian)
Salt
Pepper
Celery seed
Dried parsley
Dried sage
2 eggs
Chicken broth
As much butter as you can stand

My grandmother was Italian, and one thing we always learned was to count NOTHING — not measurements, and CERTAINLY not calories.

Line a cookie sheet with foil. Cube the bread and spread it along the foil. Sprinkle with all the seasonings except for sage. Melt some butter and drizzle lightly along bread. Toast till slightly browned.

Meanwhile, saute the celery and onions (in butter). When the onions are translucent and the bread has been toasted, combine in a large mixing bowl. In a separate bowl, whisk together two eggs and add to bread/sauteed mixture. Add sage here.

Combine all, form into 2″ balls.

In a large skillet, break out the butter and carefully line up the balls. Be careful when flipping/rotating them — they are prone to fall apart early on in the cooking cycle.

Fry until they’re to your desired level of doneness (I like them slightly crispy), all the while adding tiny drops of chicken broth and milk (go easy on those — less is definitely more, else you’ll lose that yummy butter flavor and crispiness) to keep the balls from drying out.

And for as good as they are when you cook them, they taste 10 times better the next day!

My good (non-blogging) friend Angie gives us a recipe for Parmesan Spinach Balls, which uses stuffing for consistency:

Parmesan Spinach Balls

2 (10 ounce) packages frozen chopped spinach, thawed and drained
2 cups Italian-style seasoned bread crumbs
1 cup grated Parmesan cheese
1/2 cup butter, melted
4 small green onion, finely chopped
4 eggs, lightly beaten salt and pepper to taste

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees

2. In a medium bowl, mix the frozen chopped spinach, Italian-style seasoned bread crumbs, Parmesan cheese, butter, green onion, eggs, salt and pepper. Shape the mixture into 1 inch balls.

3. Arrange the balls in a single layer on a large baking sheet. Bake in the preheated oven 10 to 15 minutes, until lightly browned. Yields: 10 servings.

DON’T FORGET THE DIPS

No, I’m not talking about forgetting to invite your redneck relatives to the party (they show up uninvited anyway because they know there’s food in them-thar kitchens!). I’m talking about those centerpiece-quality spreads that transform ordinary crackers into little tiny plates of joy.

I’m going to invite myself to Silver Blue’s house, because someone needs to sample all of these great recipes! John will let us help ourselves to a Tasty Ham Ball, Chicken Ball, Veggie Ball and Dried Beef Cheese Ball.

And in my house, I feel it is my right as hostess to laugh when the biggest (human) cheese balls at the party dig into the cheese balls on the pretty platters. Because it’s proof positive that you ARE what you eat!

Beth would make my mom proud with this one:

Salmon Spread Cheeseball

1 small can of salmon
1 teaspoon lemon juice
2 8-ounce packages cream cheese

Drain salmon and pick out bones and skin and discard. Mix salmon, lemon juice and cream cheese together. Form into a ball and sprinkle with chives. Serve with crackers or rye rounds.

Editor’s note: My Mom makes it with that new pre-packaged smoked salmon that’s in the canned fish aisle, and she swears by adding fresh parsley to it.

I make tons of dips throughout the year, and I’m one of those people who NEVER remembers how I made it the last time because I don’t write it down. So bear with me, I’m giving you my horseradish dip ingredients and telling you to use as much as you like to fit your tastes:

Cheesy Bacon Horseradish Dip

Cream cheese, softened
Bacon, crumbled (*real* bacon, fried up in all its greasy glory)
Shredded cheddar cheese
Horseradish (I use extra hot)

Cream all ingredients together — toss into the freezer for an hour. Form into a ball; roll in crushed pecans and surround with crackers.

SWEET TOOTH

As a way to cope with dysfunctional family gatherings, nothing’s better than whipping up a few batches of what I like to call “booze balls.” It’s always fun to feed them to the teetotalers who need a drink more than any of us. 😉

From Angie, we have Chocolate Chip Eggnog Balls, which are no-bake cookies with cream cheese, spiced dough, chocolate chips and an outer coating of pecans:

Chocolate Chip Eggnog Balls

2 (3 ounce) packages cream cheese, softened
4 cups sifted confectioners’ sugar
1 tablespoon heavy cream
1 teaspoon brandy
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/8 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/2 cup miniature semisweet chocolate chips
1 1/4 cups finely chopped pecans

1. In a large bowl, cream together the cream cheese and confectioners’ sugar. Beat in the heavy cream and brandy. Combine the salt, cinnamon and nutmeg, stir into the cream cheese mixture along with the mini chips to form a smooth dough. Drop by rounded spoonfuls onto a cookie sheet. Chill for 5 minutes.

2. Roll the chilled dough into balls and roll them in the chopped pecans to coat completely. Yields: 42 servings.

Missouri Mud Balls from Morning Coffee & Afternoon Tea. These are kid-friendly and use oats. I am going to have to try these because, seriously, yum.

Rum Balls from Punctilious. It’s neat how these have become such a tradition in so many families, yet we all make them in a variety of different ways. I’m also fascinated by the stories behind how our recipes came to be, and you’ll find one of those here.

Chocolate Rum Balls (and Chocolate Bourbon Balls) courtesy of John at Silver Blue.

If you ever want to shut me up, you can feed me Chocolate Truffles. Thanks to Tink for the submission!

Beth shares with us her recipe for Mexican Wedding Cookies:

Mexican Wedding Cookies

1 cup soft butter
� cup sifted confectioners sugar
� teaspoon salt
1 � teaspoons vanilla
2 tablespoons water
2 � cups flour
1 cup chopped nuts

Cream butter, sugar, and salt until light and fluffy. Blend in water and vanilla. Stir in flour and nuts. Chill dough for 30 minutes for easy handling. Shape chilled dough in small balls and place on an ungreased cookie sheet. Bake at 350 for 12-15 minutes or until cream colored. While still warm roll in confectioners sugar. Cool and roll again in confections sugar.

I’m going to share my own personal recipe for “Dirt Balls,” as I like to call them. My grandfather loves these:

Dawn’s Dirt Balls

17 Oreo cookies (regular, no double-stuffed)
3/4 cup finely chopped pecans
2 tablespoons light corn syrup
3 tablespoons Kahlua
1/2 cup powdered sugar
1.5 teaspoons vanilla
A few dashes of cinnamon

Toss the Oreos into a Ziploc bag (and the pecans into a separate bag) and crush ’em. Some people use food processors; I personally like to hammer the bags with a meat tenderizer to take out my frustrations. Cooking is fun!

Measure out 1.5 cups of the crushed cookies and mix with the remaining ingredients.

Optional: I like to refrigerate the dough for an hour — it’s easier to work with.

Form into 1″ balls.

Roll balls in remaining cookie crumbs OR dip in melted chocolate OR roll in sprinkles/jimmies. I use orange/black around Halloween and roll them in finely crushed nuts when I want them to be “healthier.” Hah. 😉

Store in airtight container with waxed paper between the layers.

BONUS

All you have to do to change the recipe is to change the liqueur and type of cookie. I also love Amaretto Balls — in which case the 17 Oreos become 29 Vanilla Wafers and the Kahlua becomes Amaretto. Either cookie type is lovely with Bailey’s Irish Cream, too.

I actually developed my Dirt Balls recipe after tasting my friend Angie’s Kahlua Balls. I never asked for the recipe (until this Carnival), so I present (first) her Amaretto round-cookie recipe as well as her Kahlua Balls and Rum Balls. (Yes, we loves us some spirits!)

Amaretto Butter Balls

1 cup butter
1/2 cup confectioners’ sugar
2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon salt
1/4 cup amaretto liqueur
3/4 cup finely chopped almonds (optional)
1/2 cup confectioners’ sugar for rolling

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

2. In a medium bowl, cream together the butter and 1/2 cup confectioners’ sugar until smooth. Stir in the flour and salt until well blended, then mix in the Amaretto liqueur. Fold in chopped almonds if desired. Roll the dough into walnut sized balls. Place the cookies 2 inches apart onto the cookie sheet.

3. Bake for 8 to 10 minutes in the preheated oven. Allow cookies to cool on baking sheet for 5 minutes before removing to a wire rack to cool completely. Roll cookies in remaining 1/2 cup confectioners’ sugar while still warm.

Yields: 24 servings

Kahlua Balls

2 1/2 c Oreos; crushed
1 c Nuts; chopped fine
1 c Powdered sugar
1/3 c Kahlua
2 tb Dark corn syrup
Powdered sugar

Combine crushed oreo cookie crumbs, nuts and powdered sugar in a large bowl. Add Kahlua and corn syrup. Mix well. Shape into 1″ balls; roll in powdered sugar. Place in airtight container and chill overnight.

NOTE: Creme de cacao may be used in place of Kahlua.

Yields: 36 servings

No-Bake Rum Balls

A holiday favorite! Try using brandy in place of the rum.

2 1/2 cups crushed vanilla wafers
1 cup confectioners’ sugar
2 tablespoons cocoa powder
1 cup chopped walnuts
3 tablespoons dark corn syrup
1/4 cup rum

1. In a medium sized bowl, mix together the vanilla wafers, cocoa and sugar. Stir in the chopped walnuts, corn syrup and rum. Mix until well blended.

2. Form dough into 2 inch balls and roll in confectioners’ sugar. Store in covered tin. Yields: 36 servings.

My buddy Beth submitted a similar Rum Ball recipe, which I won’t duplicate but I do have to share my favorite line from it: “Calories: Unknown, and after about 10, who cares? ;)” Beth also notes that you can roll the balls in cocoa or in ground chocolate. I like the way she thinks!

Beth also has a family-friendly recipe using Oreo cookies:

Oreo Cookie Balls

Crush 1 package of Oreo Cookies in a food processor
Transfer to mixing bowl
Mix in 8 oz cream cheese
Form into balls and refrigerate
Dip in white baking chocolate (I added 1 Tablespoon of shortening to the white chocolate and then melted in microwave.)

Refrigerate prior to serving. Makes about 3 1/2 dozen. Enjoy!!!

Now that we’ve gotten the ball (ha!) rolling, Beth knows a thing or two about the Buckeye State, and she submits one of my FAVORITE cookies, Buckeyes:

Buckeyes

1/2 cup butter melted
1 cup peanut butter
1 3/4 to 2 cups powdered sugar
1 16 ounce pkg. chocolate chips
1/4 bar paraffin wax

Mix butter, peanut butter and sugar and roll into small balls. Chill for a few hours or overnight for better results. Melt the chocolate chips and wax in a double boiler. Using a toothpick, dip peanut butter ball into the melted chocolate leaving a small area at the top of the “buckeye.” Place on waxed paper until firm. May be stored in the refrigerator.

SilverBlue has a different recipe for Peanut Butter Balls, which sounds good because all this working with hot chocolate dipping sauces just keeps you from eating the cookies, and these are ready-to-serve almost immediately!

AFTER THE BALL

Now that we’ve made enough bite-size appetizers and desserts for our guests to snack on while they’re roaming and networking with the other fabulous guests you’ve invited, we can move on to other holiday-themed dishes. Pin up your hair and breathe in the fragrance of fruits, spices, coffees and various other dishes that you’d prefer your guests be sitting down to enjoy. 😉

SUGAR AND SPICE …

Apples go hand-in-hand with the holidays as well. People flock to the Big Apple to freeze their behinds off and to watch the big, apple-shaped ball drop. For those of us who avoid the crowds, staying at home and cooking with apples a lovely way to add festive fragrance to our kitchens as those treats disappear in less time than it took us to prepare them!

You can almost taste the pie in the photo provided of Lattice-Top Apple Pie from Blonde Sagacity!

Apple Pie Cake and Rum Butter Sauce from The Bitch Girls sounds like music to my taste buds.

Ginger Gingerbread Bundt Cake from Triticale will unquestionably add some spice to your life.

It has fruit, so it HAS to be healthy, right? 🙂 All hail the Raspberry Souffle from Mensa Barbie.

… AND EVERYTHING NICE

Black-Eyed Peas aren’t just a great pop group, but they’re also a longtime new year’s tradition in the South. Dubious Wonder ensures we will have good luck for the year to come.

It’s always good luck when you can breathe life into holiday leftovers with Split Pea Soup, as prepared by Sun Comprehending Glass.

In my family, we eat Italian foods for luck (and because they’re tasty). So, fire up some Friday Night Pizza a la Life in a Shoe!

This is a 3-for-1 recipe collection (Berghoff Sour Cocktail, Creamed Spinach and Ragout a la Deutsch) at The Glittering Eye, from the soon-to-be-closed Berghoff Restaurant in Chicago.

Wayne’s Mom gives us recipes as well as a video fill our tummies and warm our hearts this season.

In her words: “During his four-day pass for Christmas, Sgt. West started the round of holiday visits with Myron and me at the home of Blair and Leslie Bingham, my brother and sister-in-law who live in Jackson, Miss.

“Click here to watch a short video of Wayne introducing our favorites: Padow’s Country Ham and Les’s Famous Christmas Cream Cheese Braids.”

DRINKS

Sure, we talked about apples earlier, but these drinks deserved a category of their own:

Mulled Cider from Meanderings will make your season bright.

Everybody’s Irish with a Cup o’ th’ Irish as created by Blog d’Elisson.

LAST BUT CERTAINLY NOT LEAST …

I saved Kevin at Techno Gypsy for last so I can segue into promoting the next carnival, because he’s graciously agreed to host it. (I’m just clever like that. Ha.) 😉

He and his mom have been cooking up a storm this holiday season, so he has lots of goodies to make and stories to tell.

First comes Mom, Apple Pie and Lamb. (Editor’s note: Now, for those of you whose minds are planted squarely in the gutter like mine, Mom is not an ingredient. 🙂 This is a 2-for-1 recipe deal for Lamb Roast and for Kevin’s Mom’s Apple Pie.)

They also made Kolace (cookies with cheese filling and cherries), Tourtierre (meat pie), Chergies (fried dough) , and Venison Bulgoi.

And they’re making more for next week, so stay tuned!

YOU’RE INVITED TO THE NEXT CARNIVAL!

Fear not, kids — the circus is leaving town but it’s a traveling one. Next week, we’ll be celebrating “Russian Christmas” over at Techno Gypsy. To make a submission, send it to recipe-dot-carnival-at-gmail-dot-c0m. The deadline is noon Central on Saturday.

SO LONG FROM THE BELLE OF THIS BALL

And with that, I am handing over my apron and chef’s hat to Kevin and making myself a cocktail (or 10). The best part about these carnivals? That there’s no cleanup afterward. 🙂

Have a joyous and prosperous 2006, and thanks for playing. See you when we wake up from the food coma!