Caterwauling

Is it ghetto to uncork a bottle of wine and drink it straight from the bottle?

*glug*

Reader Poll Monday, the only thing I look forward to about this hideous, wretched excuse for a day.

1. Are you as sick as I am of being smacked in the face with 9/11 every 5 seconds? Yes, it was a big, awful tragedy, but why the need to devote so much time, energy and money to making us all re-live it over and over and over again?
Um, yeah, I’m over it. Did we avenge it? Did we get the bad guys? Why is it we’ve got the asshole with the (theoretically) biggest dick in charge of the free world but we haven’t found weiner-dick bin Laden? Christ, he’s like the goddamned gopher in “Caddyshack” and we’ve got Bill Murray trying to take him out. GAWD.

The conservative press yaps that the more the liberals question/criticize our country’s actions, the stronger the terrorists become. Or whatever the argument du jour is. What a crock of shit. The more we question, the more we learn, the more we can move forward. Maybe we don’t need to share everything with the public, but instead of Tweedledum gleefully playing war with his buddies, maybe he can invite some devil’s advocates into his playroom to supply a balance and we can all find a nice, rational middle ground and solve this shit once and for all.

2. What’s your favorite kind of cookie?
Icing cookies. There’s this bakery in Pittsburgh, Kribel’s, that makes the best cookies with awesome white frosting that’s always tipped in some season-appropriate color.

3. Do you wear a watch?
Nope. Have 20 of them. But the cell phone’s time is always updated, so that rules.

4. Coffee or tea?
Javaaaahhhhhh!!! Sweet and light, please.

5. Would you rather eat a roll of toilet paper or eat a kitchen sponge with a scrubby side?
Am I to assume that neither one has been used? TP, then. I can use the fiber. 😉

6. Do you regularly burn candles at home?
I wouldn’t be a good little witch without them. And I use my powers for good.

7. What is the last thing you did to treat yourself?
I am waiting for payday to have enough money to get my migraine prescription filled, although if people would just stop giving me headaches, I could save the money and get a manicure.

I treat myself inexpensively. I have to. Designer clearance racks are my weakness — got two pairs of dress pants a few weeks ago for $12.99 each that had retailed at $89 apiece. They’re a little long (or I’m a little short) but seriously, they were CHEAP! Nice things for sub-retail price bring me joy.

The little things have to make us happy because for most of us, the small things (to others) ARE the big things.

8. Would you rather be lied to by someone you love or forced to lie to someone you love?
I’m not a good liar but I will not withstand being lied to, so let me do the lying, thanks.

9. Have you attended any of your high school or college reunions?
Fuck no to high school. College, sort of. I liked college. I had a solid group of friends freshman year, and most of us are still in contact, even if by degrees of separation.

10. Ask me something.
Is it me, or does it seem like the joke is always on us?