Caterwauling

I think it’s time to just go back to bed already.

So I got up this morning and put on a pot of coffee (chocolate-cherry beans. Mmmm, good), and that was about the only thing I managed to execute with any success. From there, I proceeded to:

1. Put on a pot of water to boil so I could make some pasta to take to work for lunch.

2. Put the pot of water on one of the three burners that I did NOT turn on.

3. Visited the stove to wonder WTF smelled funny and realized all the water had boiled out of the fucking saucepan.

4. Did my morning workload.

5. Just got off the phone with one of my editors to ask why I hadn’t pushed one of the things live.

6. Pushed it live.

7. Got another call asking why the wrong chart was in the right article.

8. Haaaaaaa.

9. Explained that I am an idiot and I had done all the legwork but that clearly I had experienced a lobotomy overnight. Made the fix within 12 seconds. Realized nobody noticed my mistakes for seven hours and fuck, I should have just slept in.

10. Realized that I forgot my lunch and it’s sitting on the stove where I left it. (Did I turn off that burner?)

Oh, but wait, there’s more. It’s called “Breakfast, or Lack Thereof.”

11. I accidentally grabbed the cat food box from the fridge instead of the cereal.

12. And I poured it into my bowl.

13. AND I poured milk over it.

14. The last of the milk, might I add.

15. It’s noon and I am very hungry right now, come to think of it — I guess that’s why!

BUT THE DAY ISN’T A TOTAL WASH

1. I got a very nice compliment from my boss first thing this morning.

2. I just got a very nice text message from a very nice young man.

And in that, the good always washes away the bad!

Something has seemed off about the “American Idol” auditions that aired Tuesday and Wednesday nights. I’d thought it was perhaps because I was watching them at work that they just didn’t have that same spark, but enh, that isn’t it. Then someone remarked that they seemed to feature too many of the bad singers, and that comment was spot-on.

In past years, “Idol” hopefuls have bitched that they didn’t get enough airtime during the audition phases — that we the people developed a love for our favorites because we saw them more and became more personally involved with their journeys. Whatever. I thought Fantasia sucked from the get-go and never exactly fell in love with her ghetto-fabulous ass. Hell, I voted for Jennifer Hudson that season till she got the boot (I think she, like Chris Daughtry last season, got voted out at No. 5, just going to show that we lose the best one of all during that particular week). I’m thrilled Ms. Hudson got the Golden Globe, and I have no doubt that Daughtry will go on to get a Grammy.

In any event, I don’t know if the folks at Fox listened to the whiny bitches who actually did get past Round One and decided not to show many (if any) good singers in this first week, or if there even WERE any good ones. The Minneapolis and Seattle auditions were tragically bad, judging by what we saw, and there seems to be hope for Memphis on next week’s show.

But yeah, I haven’t identified anyone with a shot of earning my vote this season. Hell, I think they put one screechy bitch through just so they could see her drive her fellow singers crazy in the Hollywood group auditions. Great reason, kids. Give Paula some more drugs, will ya? Fuck, pass them to ME … maybe it’ll help me to commit yet another season of my life to following this show and voting entirely too much for its contestants.