Cognitive dysentery, served up piping-hot daily!
- Not one to have anything on Paris Hilton, Tommy Lee/Pamela Anderson, Vince Neil, Bret Michaels and Dustin Diamond, the next person to have a sex tape get stolen? MY MOTHER. She swears she accidentally threw out an old tape, and it happened to be the same night that her ghetto-ass next-door neighbor got overwhelmed by curiosity at Mom’s very-private life and WENT THROUGH HER TRASH. What a fucking freak, and I ain’t talking about Mom. Although, admit it — how many of you can say your parents now have a sex tape (probably) on the Internet? 😉
- I have a stalker. Yes, ANOTHER. Seriously, people, stop it with the stalking already. I’m not as interesting as you think I am. Really. Well, actually I AM, but still. Begone! My boys are taking care of the latest adventure. Have I mentioned how much I love big, strong men who worship me? The sane ones, let me clarify!
- I just got a 2008 calendar and happily marked off my next birthday. When … *gulp* … I realized it was “34.” Oh dear GOD how did I get this old? I always said I’d be married (and probably divorced — twice!) by 34. Talk about a slap in the face with a brick!
- I wasn’t necessarily lost last night as I left one area of D.C. to go to another, but since you can’t directly backtrack anywhere, I did have a moment of trying a new route to get back to where I needed to be. And I assure you, nobody knows D.C. better than I do because I”m always turned-around in it. But I stepped briefly into Northern Virginia, and I couldn’t help but realize I always find myself lost in that area of town. Metaphorically, metaphysically AND directionally.
- This online dating adventure? Is suddenly quite promising. I’m pretty fucking pleased with it, actually. Once you get away from the sites “everybody” knows about and locate more of a niche, it’s so much more manageable. I yanked my profile off every site but one, and it’s yielded more results than the others combined.
- A friend of mine is looking to move to my neighborhood. I’m hoping she considers moving to my particular place. We hang out here and there, and she’s fun and always thinking up new things to do. It’ll be terrific to have a nearby partner in crime.
- A friend recommended the new Sara Bareilles CD on iTunes. I. Cannot. Stop. Playing. It. I’m partial to “City,” although “Between the Lines” sufficiently killed me inside and don’t get me started on “One Sweet Love.” Because I will have to listen to them again. And again.