Caterwauling

All I’ve got to say today?

*flashing hairy eyeball in one particular direction*

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Dear God, thank you for not making me an absolute flaming asshole. Please give those who are, exactly what they deserve. …

I had the first restful weekend in a year, and it’s totally shot. *SCREAM*

Am investing in a litterbox for under my desk for days like today when peeing! eating! not-doing-fewer-than-67-things simultaneously and on (past?) deadline! wasn’t feasible until 4-the-fuck-o’clock.

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I have a friend who escapes life’s hell by spending weeks at a time volunteering in impoverished countries. Yes, in a world where THAT qualifies as relaxation, there but by the grace of God go I.

I’ve also lost more vacation days than I’ve used this year. NAWT KEWL.

Seems like we’ve got to launch a new product every time I want to take a day off. And on the next day I was planning to take off (seeing as though someone who was supposed to meet me somewhere now cannot. Vague much?) to go see said person in their world, I have another f’in product launch that day.

Seriously universe, please to stop screwing with me. Kthxbai!

Remember when I paid $15 for a glass of Estancia pinot noir?

I found ESTANCIA PINOT NOIR at Wegman’s (which is God’s gift to grocery shopping) for $14.99 a bottle. A BOTTLE …

… which I of course bought when I saw it. 😉

Now, I know the wine I had at the restaurant on Friday was an older vintage (I picked up a 2007 and plan to let it age), and it came from the vineyard’s “Pinnacles” collection, which seems to be worth about $30 a bottle.

You know, it’s hard trying to be a sommelier on an Arbor Mist budget!

Today I rocked the brand-new vest that I bought last night when I went out with The Girls^TM, so I felt cute. Not only was it the only vest in the entire store, but it’s a size down from what I normally buy AND IT FIT!

Of course, I did take it off before I ate dinner today, so the buttons wouldn’t blow off and blind anyone within a 25-mile radius. 😉

Anyway, I don’t talk about my friends much on this page (probably because they read it — *waves*). But we did have someone from outside the usual circle decide to join us for a post-shopping dinner last night. And it was fine but, man, was it weird.

With this particular group of friends, we’d started out planning most of our outings in a public forum. But given that a solid, core group of us had formed and no one else seemed to be joining us anyway, we typically plan our events off-list.

For me, it means a nice, dependable, monthly outing with people I like and trust who won’t disown me if I don’t make it to any of the other events in-between pilgrimages to the various corners of the greater D.C. area.

Anyway, our last event was planned online so that we could maybe introduce some new people to the group. Since two of our core six members came later than our original Fab Four in this very way, we are always up for finding another person to make the growing circle complete.

We’d kept membership at females-only. Which has been fine and fun but yeah, we’re still hot-blooded chicks who could use a distraction, too. 😉 So, fine, all the men who said they wanted to join the group, the doors were opened for them.

So, this one dude decides to join us last night. And he was smart and articulate and seemed to be doing well for himself. But one has to wonder why a man his age would come pal around with a half-dozen 30-ish women.

Then again, I probably just answered the question myself!

And the fact that he drove almost as far as I did, as we do a traveling circus of sorts, just to come eat with us was, hmm, interesting, I guess.

I don’t know if we were worth the drive for him, since we all sort of stared at him in curiosity. 😉

A couple of the girls had mentioned in passing that they’d had a meal they liked at Golden Corral. (Ugh. Bleargh. Yecch. And Barf.) It was the one conversation topic that got him all aglow, and he invited all of us out to the Golden Corral this week.

(If you’re not familiar, it’s a buffet. I am not a fan of buffets in general because of the unwashed masses who stuff themselves stupid. I went to a Golden Corral in Pittsburgh a couple years ago for Thanksgiving since we have no holiday traditions. In a word, I repeat: barf.)

We all turned him down. Not to be mean at all, but it must be nice for him to be able to leave work at a reasonable hour and drive out to wherever the hell they have one of those. The rest of us work nights and holidays and everything in-between.

So, I don’t know whether we’ll see Buffet Boy again or whether we’ll continue restricting the gatherings to either ladies-only or simply just using the ol’ e-mail chain with the trusted few.

And I guess I wouldn’t say it was an epic FAIL in letting men join the group; I guess we all just had a very different idea of how it would go. In any case, ya gotta give mad props to someone who thinks he can take on six strong ladies all by himself!

In any case, I’m still waiting for evidence that there are still single, sexy bachelors in my age bracket in the metro D.C. area. I’m beginning to think it’s time to leave town to get me one of those. …

Am clearly not so good at the daily blogging part of National Blog Posting Month. Oh well. I’m sure I’ll have 30 posts by the end of the month, just concentrated in four days!

I was on a Top-Super-Seekrit Mission this week that mercifully ended last night. I was asked to moderate a panel at a convention and it would also be webcast. I wasn’t really nervous about it until yesterday when I realized I hadn’t prepared a thing for it.

So I did write down some remarks that were mostly boring but at least they served the purpose. And I was fine as I sat on the dais in front of about 300 people (and who knows how many viewers at home). But when the dude doing the recording in the back signaled to me that it was “go” time, I damn near had to stave off a full-fledged panic attack.

I’m one who gets nervous about nothing, mind you (other than wondering whether I’ll ever get my happily ever after. Everything else, I presume, will work itself out).

I figured with the very, ah, strong personalities and love of talking that my panelists possessed would save me. I mean, for all intents and purposes, it was just a televised staff meeting. And they did great. Really, really great. I mean, to be considered “good enough” to be seen in public with this crew is not a small feat.

But when I heard the sound of my own voice … in the microphone … and people waiting for the pearls of wisdom I would share and bring out of my guests … the only thing that ran through my head was, “Don’t say fuck. Don’t say fuck. OMG, don’t say FUCK!”

I didn’t say fuck. Clearly, it was the only thing ON MY MIND, but it didn’t come out. And, in that, success!

Everyone assured me that I did fine. (Could they not HEAR the terror that overtook my voice? Which went away when the session ran longer than expected and the cameras got shut off?) I even got higher compliments than that, actually.

The highest compliment of all came simply from being nominated me to do this, as some Very Important People actually thought I would do well and not publicly embarrass the company. And really, everyone was happy with me as the choice. I don’t know why. Do I NOT come across as a blithering, blathering dipshit? Because, I do have more of those moments than cohesive, articulate ones. In case you haven’t gleaned that from reading this page. 😉

Anyway, it’s over. Yay. I treated myself to a $15 glass of pinot noir and a bowl of pumpkin soup to celebrate. (I didn’t know the pinot cost as much as a BOTTLE elsewhere.) I figured I’d be served the house label and not the Estancia.

But you know what? That wine was da bomb. Truly worth driving the ol’ checking account deeper negative numbers. 😉 Hey, I earned it!

To top off a great night, I heard from my out-of-town connection, and I find myself actually starting to get a little antsy. Like, OK, I like being a few hundred miles apart because I don’t have the time to devote to anything other than my career and preserving my sanity.

But yesterday was the first time I hung up the phone and held it to my heart for a few moments, not quite sure what I was feeling but knowing that this is fine but maybe it’s not enough. I’m very cool with things unfolding as they may, if at all, and if it’s nothing, then that’s quite OK too. But at some point, a girl’s gotta find out.

In either case, as I swirled my wine in the glass, sniffed it like the pro I’ve become and nodded at all the people who looked my way, I smiled. A real, genuine, from-the-depths-of-my soul smile. It’s not that I was proud of anything I said or did last night, or that I was happy to not have embarrassed myself or my organization, but that I felt like I was going to turn out OK after all.

Here’s to hoping that wasn’t just the wine talking. 😉

So I only got about two solid hours of sleep last night, as I was dozing in front of CNN for the better part of the night last night. And it was downright amazing, to wake up and realize, holy shit, Barack Obama won! He’s our president-elect! It wasn’t just a dream!

Of course, it made for a looong workday, as I was tired as all get-out. But it was worth it — sooo worth it.

I found myself having to log out of Facebook today. I’ve had people friending me from high school — people I barely talked to then and don’t have much to say to these days — but interestingly, they’ve been de-friending me left and right, every time I posted a pro-my-guy’s-policies status update or an anti-the-other-guy’s-policies article.

Meh, whatever. I saw their Republican rhetoric and never felt the need to go, “Oooh, no, pwease shield my virgin eyes!”

And then it dawned on me today: We grew up in “Picksburgh.” In a city in which our fathers, uncles and grandfathers — blue-collar workers — were laid off from the steel mills. We were in the generation in which we might not have understood what was going on, but we saw our male providers being laid off by the thousands and we got our asses kicked around by the alcoholics that many of them became. We got food stamps and government cheese until the handouts ran out.

In other words: How can you NOT support the candidates who favor social programs, assistance for the out-of-work, tax cuts for those who need it most, and change in general?

In my words: “When did the Class of 1992 turn into right-wing nutjobs?”

I mean, Christ, I’ve been posting “I’m voting for Obama” messages and some of them had the audacity to e-mail me to remind me to vote for McCain. Hunh? I don’t expect anyone’s paying THAT close of attention to lil old me. But come on. When I sent my pro-‘Bama propaganda to friends (you know, the kind I know in person and who welcome communication from me), I made SURE that I knew my recipients’ voting status or else I didn’t share.

Now, I logged out of F-book instead of getting worked up in a lather. I don’t crap in people’s comments. It’s a free country and I am immensely RELIEVED it’s going to stay that way for the next four years. But … I honestly, remembering what I remember of these people, cannot figure out why they would vote Republican.

I knew their families. Maybe not their political leanings, but at least their — ah, shall we say, humble — upbringing … exactly like my own. I don’t want to call anybody a racist, but given the area where we grew up, it wouldn’t surprise me.

I am tickled pink that Pennsylvania was as blue as it was. I admit, I was worried about Pennsyltucky and maybe even Allegheny County. Just because it was an ethnically diverse area when I was growing up didn’t mean there weren’t some lumps in the melting pot.

The comment, though, that burned my butter was from someone who, upon hearing Obama won, wrote that “Oh, think of all those POOR BABIES who will never get a chance to LIVE because they will be MURDERED BY ABORTION NOW.”

Said she who had four of them before age 30. I’m not being judgmental — she was lucky enough to get married and have a family, and good for her. But what she and the rest of right-wing evangelical America does NOT comprehend is that the No. 1 reason for abortion? IS ECONOMICS.

There was a really poignant moment during one of the presidential debates in which John McCain was railing against Obama as being “pro-abortion,” and Obama paused and said calmly, plainly, “John, no one is pro-abortion.”

I’m fairly sure the gal who is so afraid Obama is going to be single-handedly performing vacuum aspirations is also a social worker. Which, um, I spent two years in social work. I assure you, given the conditions those kids were existing in, it definitely makes you believe quite strongly in having options available for everyone who needs them.

You know, part of my vote for Obama was in knowing that he’s going to focus on the here and now — the economy, for starters — and not be fucking around with constitutional amendments and such. I mean, here’s a conundrum: Republicans want smaller government, right? Less regulation, yes? More individual liberties and decision-making, yo? Then why oh WHY is that party so hell-bent on telling women what they cannot do with their bodies?

And that’s what worried me about Sarah Palin. That she’d be spinning around in Dick Cheney’s old office after trying on all her expensive clothes and shoes that she would keep in his human-sized safe, and decide her pet project would be overturning Roe v. Wade, or something else that has NOTHING TO DO WITH THE IMMEDIATE ISSUES AT HAND.

We all want change. We all want change we can believe in. But we also want change that is needed to make our world a better one in which to live.

And what I loved as I was half-snoozing while Obama gave his speech after midnight last night, was that he talked right to those who didn’t vote for him. To say that he’s their president, too, and he’s working just as much for them.

He wasn’t my candidate originally. But he reached out and found a way to talk to me in a way that I would listen. Now if he can just the rest of the nation to unplug their ears for a little while, he can get down to the business of governing in a way we need and DESERVE.

And God willing, in four years we’ll look back and say, damn, election night wasn’t the ONLY time that man made history in this country. Hopefully, my former high school friends and everyone else like them who are licking their wounds and crying foul will be saying the same thing. …

Main Entry: buzz·kill

Pronunciation: \ˈbəz-ˌkil\

Function: noun

Definition: When you’re in the middle of, ah, “me” time and your mommy knocks. And you KNOW she ain’t gonna wait for you to answer the door so you’ve got some, ah, hiding to do!

Related Words: “God, why are you tormenting me?”

Barack the Vote!

Originally uploaded by dcwriterdawn

I got to my voting place at 6 p.m., about two hours after I’d planned to. But I voted right away and was pleased to see the line going out the front door of the elementary school as I frolicked out.

Folks were giving away free baked goods (and not, unfortunately, sex toys. Damn!) to voters. Trust me, the only taste I want tonight is of sweet, sweet victory.

Is there a drinking game for election night? I’m thinking a celebratory swig of pinot noir for every Obama state, and a shot of tequila or SoCo for every McCain state.

When Obama wins, bottoms up! If McCain should prevail, break the bottle over your head and pray you don’t wake up for another four years of Bush-like policies or a crazy evangelical world should McCain croak before his term is up and leave what’s-‘er-nuts in charge.

I skipped my Weight Watchers meeting tonight, thinking I would have the house to myself. You know, for the first time in 13 months. But hah, I should’ve known better. So fuck it, whoever wins a state, earns a drink from me. Let the debauchery begin! (I can weigh in NEXT week!)

And please, God, you’ve had a lot of laughter at my expense. But you also let the Steelers wipe the field with the Redskins last night (in an AWESOME game), which should ensure a Democratic victory tonight. So, you can keep tormenting me to your heart’s content. One last favor, can you let my guy win this one, too? I’ll take any victory, even if it’s by proxy. At least I’ll have a reason to get out of bed tomorrow.

It’s 7 p.m. Eastern and several polls have closed. C’mon Virginia, make me proud. … gObama!!!

I don’t know WHAT it is about me that’s just PISSING everyone off today, but let’s consider it as me returning the favor, mmmkay? 😉

I’m in a delightful mood, independent of anyone else who lives, breathes or even so much as blinks within a 35-mile radius of me.

And I really don’t mean to be offensive. I think my litany of questions (regarding things like, oh, the status quo and the injustice of it all) are wearing people out. If all were hunky-dory, perhaps I wouldn’t be asking the questions that I’m asking, innocuous as they were intended to be, anyway.

Am rooting for a Steeler win tonight, not just because they’re mah boyz, but also because if the Redskins win, we get another four years of a Republican administration. Yay. Barf. NOT. I’m cheering extra-hard for the Steelers, since a Redskins’ opponent victory on Election Eve means Barack Obama will become President Obama.

I commend some of my friends who are writing in Hillary Clinton. Believe me, if we had a snowball’s chance of electing her that way, I’d be on board. But I’m aware that our system, flawed though it may be, is a two-party one at present. And a vote for anybody else is NOT a vote for Obama. And I can’t handle the burden if he does not become President-Elect.

Don’t get me wrong — my wounds are still fresh from the media basically telling people to stay home and not vote for Hillary back when she was running against Barack. And I know from past election experience that more people will be discouraged from visiting the polls, that votes recorded will somehow magically not be counted, that computers will go down and fairness may be lost in the ether. I ain’t tempting fate. My vote is going to be lost among a sea of blue here in the Democratic Republic of Washington, D.C., and that’s OK by me.

Until then, back to packing up my cubicle. I once said that the better my title gets, the smaller my office gets. I’m going from the Cadillac of cubicles — er, sorry, “workstations” — and going into one with an eighth of a window and one wall separating me from someone else I am sure I will come to piss off. Because if nothing else, I am an equal-opportunity offender. 😉

I have a blog post brewing about topics I should never say out loud. Which means there had BETTER be a former-department happy hour in the works SOON. …

Oh, I did promise to write something every day this month, right? Bleagh.

OK, so I was headed toward Alexandria for what would be a lovely brunch at Overwood with Tiff and Tom when I decided to get my newly lit “check engine” light, well, checked at my old mechanic in that area. Five hours later — yes, they picked me up, took me out and returned me safely — I got my car out of the automotive pokey. And lo, I ain’t singing yet, ’cause this drama is far from over.

First they had to order a part from another mechanic. It came at some point. And it came WRONG. So they had to order it from another place. And had to go pick it up. Oh and BY the way, did I know that two of my tires have holes in them?

I’m like, fine, ring me up some new tires.

“Oh, we don’t sell tires,” they said.

“Of course you don’t,” I said, somewhat cheerfully, somewhat maniacally.

We’ve moved the nearly deflated tires to the rear of the car since the power and, more importantly, the BRAKES are in the front.

While I was waiting for this blessed event to come to a merciful end, I got a call from someone saying that he probably wasn’t going to be able to make it to something I’d invited him to.

Of course. See, there’s a reason I’ve stopped getting my hopes up. And this was it. But I admit to letting myself wonder about it from time to time, when I REALLY needed to picture something going right. Oh well. Another time, right?

This all came after my computer — both the monitor AND the hard drive — climaxed together and committed suicide by asphyxiation this morning, too. Yay.

And I remembered why I stopped using my laptop, as plugging the cable Internet cord into it never did work. I had asked a ton of people how to make it go, but other than an “Uh, did you disable the firewall?” and a corresponding ass scratch, that was pretty much where I quit pushing the issue.

Anyway, I was so glad I was done with having a car payment (on my own vehicle, anyway) but between today’s repair and the tires I have to find the fucking time to buy this week, well, I didn’t REALLY want to be saving up for a new ‘puter, did I?

Speaking of, this thing’s about to fizzle yet again. …