Today’s highlights:
1. Learning that “Montreal” is derived from “Mount Royal.”
2. Having a bumpy flight for three hours, surrounded by people who refuse to wear deodorant. The guy next to me was so nice, but I wanted to jump off the plane every time he lifted his arm to operate the video screen on the seat in front of him. Woof.
Oh, the highlight? The plane didn’t crash. It sure felt like it. At this time last year, I was on a plane that almost DID crash. And I was so through with my job/life that I willed it to go down in flames. This year? Not nearly as unhappy with my life as I was then. Not even close!
3. Cheese and cabernet. Emphasis on cheese, and lots of it. Cheese platter and a brie-and-artisanal ham (whatever that means) baguette. Mmmm, cheese.
4. Met a guy from Zurich, for whom it’s now 5 a.m. (he flew in earlier today). He said he only stays up till 5 a.m. when he screws a hot woman, which only happens every five years or so. Ha! I like it here already. 😉
5. Joke of the night (not from the guy in No. 4): Q: What did the two tampons say to each other? A: Nothing. They’re stuck up bitches.
6. Re: No. 3. I was at a hotel bar up the street called Le Beaver Club. I’m not kidding.
7. Joke No. 2 of the night: Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water? A: I just got laid; not sure I can get hard right now.