I don’t want to say I’ve taken on too much work. But I will say that I bust my butt all damn day and still manage to disappoint everyone for falling short all-around.
Now I know what it’s like to be a man!
Seriously, I fear my clients are lying there with that same “THAT’S what he thinks is good sex? Good Lord” disappointment-cum-utter-relief-that-it’s-over when it comes to my output lately.
There’s such an ocean between what I’m good at and what I want to do, and I constantly swim the Straits of Mediocrity to do a little of both. I get some victories and some creative outlets. It’s as much of a balance as I’ve ever had.
I have an opportunity to change all that. But … does that mean I’ll soar or come groveling back in the next three months?
I tried again to channel the Archangel Michael about my career path. I forget what I dreamed about last night, but I don’t think the answer was there.
I can’t make any more dumb decisions, you know? Made enough of those for one lifetime, thanks. Everything I have going right now is fine. I could stay with everyone for a while and be OK with it.
But … what if the road-less-taken ISN’T the one that’s paved with good intentions?
Right now I know I can’t do it all, although I try. But what if I chuck all caution to the wind, take that other road and I’m STILL not able to make it work?
A friend explained to me that Mercury in retrograde isn’t always a total bitch. That oftentimes, and this particular cycle applies, it simply gives you an opportunity to backpedal and review your choices with the possibility of changing the outcome.
What would I change, other than everything? Hmm…