Another week that there’s not enough wine to wash it away. Hooray.
Managed to leave work before 7 almost every night this week. Beats 9 p.m. I’ll take it!
Everybody seems to have good news lately, and I am over-the-moon happy for them about it. And I put it all down in my gratitude journal.
Just … one day I’d like to put something in my gratitude journal that isn’t just thanking God for being good to those I love, or thanking Him for what hasn’t yet come to pass.
I did get a bit of good news this morning. Nothing astounding, but for once I did something for me instead of putting everybody else before me.
Nothing else new. Been kind of isolated rather than putting my problems out there. Made a new friend at work. Not sure who I can trust anymore but too overjoyed (*cough*) sometimes to care.
The same characters are still in my world although their starring roles have been changed to supporting. But every last one of them deserves an Oscar for something, and it’s mostly avoidance of physical presence. (*looking at Topo Gigio*)
I had a revelation yesterday. The moment my life turned to shit was about 17 Valentine’s Days ago, when I worked till midnight, had to postpone dinner reservations three times, and was so annoyed by work and life and him that I broke up with him before the appetizer even arrived.
Seventeen years of working till midnight, lackluster relationships and being strung out on exhaustion and wine. Jesus Christ.
Get me out of this pattern, someone … anyone. This “doing the same thing for two decades and hoping for a different result” is FAR beyond insanity … it’s downright criminal.