Caterwauling

So I’m noticing a little bit of a “rage” theme in my past, oh, seven thousand posts. Or however many I’ve published (and not pulled back into draft mode) since 2001.

In any event, I need a clean slate. Like, now.

I made plans Thursday night. Because I will be in civilization again. I have to start somewhere when it comes to putting my life back together.

Maybe I can make plans every Thursday. Shit is POSSIBLE now. More than it used to be, anyway.

I said to mom the other day, isn’t it funny how my two highest-paying jobs were the ones were I was also the freest/happiest? My world wasn’t defined ONLY by pre-market, market, after-market and weekends.

Granted, there were other things wrong with my world. But if I needed to go get my shit together, I could.

And did.

Tonight I didn’t go back to work. I settled in for an evening of “Real Housewives” and “Mistresses.”

I’ll pay for it tomorrow. I always do.

But I don’t feel as wretched as I did when I last posted three and a half hours ago. That’s as close to feeling good as I have in a long while.

The hour and a half I spent the dentist’s chair getting a HOLE DRILLED IN MY HEAD so far has been the highlight of the day.

When he was coming at me with the needle, I said why do you people have to upcharge me for novocaine when I’ve been numb inside for years?

I started working at the crack o’ me today. It’s 7:28 p.m. and I’m going to take a break and do something else around the house I need to do. Then I get to sign back on again and do more work.

Don’t you wish you were me?

Worked the weekend. Got to my desk super-early. Cranked out a bunch of projects. Annndddd …. had to postpone the dentist appointment because there’s too much to do this morning. My spirit is about as hollow as the tooth they’re going to work on if/when I get there.