Today Melissa Rivers buries her mother Joan. And I’m taking this loss pretty badly.
I ache for Melissa. She and her mom were like me and mine — always together. Always up to no good. Always laughing and doing everything to survive together.
Nobody knows how much longer they will have their mom. But I know my time with mine isn’t going to be long enough.
Melissa has a great career and a son she loves. I don’t know what’ll be left of me when I have to endure Melissa’s loss. Or that I could even get a day off to deal with it.
This is why I get so sick of dicking around with stupid shit. That’s taking time away from my family. It’s denying me the opportunity to fight for her. Instead I let everything slide. Waiting for someday when I get a week or a month off, to knock on doors and make calls and do research that I’m always too busy/tired to fit in.
But yes, let’s quibble over over numbers I don’t want to be in charge of or a paragraph that nobody’s going to read. BY ALL MEANS let’s spend unpaid hours on that.
I don’t plan to blame anyone but myself. But I’m going to have a really hard time going back to the routines that are killing us both.