My most-oft uttered phrase today: OFMFGS
Oh for motherfucking God’s sake …
What I don’t do to make this shit look effortless.
It occurred to me today that it is killing my charge that I am such a Total Badass that it will be impossible to measure up.
But I think said individual is willing to die trying.
And that’s the warrior soul I was hoping to see a little sooner/more often.
That and shit really is too fucking hard around these parts …
In the aftermath of it being Boss’ Day yesterday for the second time this year, I have a revelation.
I suddenly understand why bosses dress up when they don’t have to … have an office with a door even in a collaborative environment … and work from home at every available opportunity.
It is truly the only way to instill some fear and awe into people to shock them into realizing you are not amused and you are not their friend and your expectations shouldn’t have to be revised downward every quarter like the earnings guidance of a crap company.
My charge made my heart swell yesterday when I was rattling off my to-do list … of things “I” had to do. He stopped me and said, “It’s not you anymore. We are a ‘we’ now.”
Which is the only reason why, on Day 7-ish of training on the same process and it was still a three-hour disaster, the body count is still below 1.
Of course, I LOL’d because, no, it’s all on me. Believe me, I hate it that it has to be that way. I WANT to share the love without it adding three hours into the middle of every day. And “I’d rather be alone than wish I were” is still my favorite phrase in love and work.
Ask me how much training (one day) I got on this process. Ask me how long it took me to train someone else (two days).
Ask me how many times I wonder whether I should have just hired the asshole bully kid with the cheap suit and the entitlement issue who actually knew his shit.
Look, I’d rather have the guy who has my back. I know this. But someone made a comment yesterday that this person “helps Goddess to be Goddess” and it clicked …
The Pygmalion Effect
See, we all focus on each other’s flaws and shortcomings and inabilities. I mean, when you’re Perfect in Every Way (*gag*) yourself, it’s no wonder, really.
The Pygmalion Effect is basically the non-Bible translation of “speaking favor” over someone — saying something as though it were already true.
So every day when I say my prayers (generally in my POS car when I’m thanking God for my mom, my job … and for them and the car not blowing up on me), I realize I do a bit of praying to Pygmalion anyway.
I thank God for perfect health and perfect love, for saying the right things, for being able to swiftly react to idiot drivers, to being amazing and attracting amazing people.
Speaking favor over oneself, essentially. Assume it will happen and be grateful in advance.
So I’m going to thank the heavens for someone who worships the Goddess as she deserves. (Which, I do think we have that.) I will also thank God for the learning sensors to fire on all cylinders. And for the ability to work from home where no one can hear my reactions in the meantime.