Saturday night musings

May 30th, 2015, 8:41 PM by Goddess

That thing I said earlier about dysfunctional relationships being the most honest … I meant it. 

You know to temper your expectations. 

You don’t have to lie to anyone if you don’t want to. 

You let them be totally honest because, really, are they being honest in their real lives? Probably not. Maybe they’re deliciously kinky. Why let that go to waste?

And maybe they’re not telling you the whole truth. But it’s their truth. Or what they want you to believe about them. 

In any event, there’s a certain magic that happens when you can be completely unguarded around someone. Clothes and other disguises scattered about. Pick them up off the floor when you leave. 

I miss that. I miss that moment inside the snow globe. That moment of being vulnerable but not feeling vulnerable. That moment of feeling invincible when outside that globe you’re anything but. 

Sometimes you can go back. Even if you’re in there by yourself. 

I think I let that hopeful part of me die earlier this year. But it was more that I lost hope about certain things rather than everything. 

Lately it’s been hard to keep my head up. But even if all this — *waves hand around at what’s left* — ends, I’ll still be OK. 

I dint know what comes next. But it’s got to be something. And I’m pretty certain that everyone who has been touched by my magic won’t forget it. 

It’s high time I started using my powers for good … my own good. 

And that is my truth. 

  



Saturday musings 

May 30th, 2015, 9:06 AM by Goddess

It occurs to me that my most-dysfunctional relationships appear to be the most-honest ones. 

I mean, boys are yucky. And they lie. And they are high-maintenance and want to get laid all the time. 

Which, hey, I can live with. Not the lying but I’d rather be contorting myself into unnatural positions a few times a day rather than wondering where else they’re getting it if I’m not providing it. 

In any event, I wonder whether I’m loath to bring new people into my life because there’s only room for one all-consuming job in my life.