Back in the saddle, more or less

September 7th, 2015, 9:35 PM by Goddess

Livin’ la vida Boca again, this time not in central Florida. 

Thundercunt was raging when we got home. Oh joy. I’m hoping yo-yo bitch shuts those meat flaps she calls lips long enough to let me pass out till the workday starts not-bright but certainly early. 

The escape was good. Ate at my favorite places. Swam in my favorite pool at my favorite resort. On top of that, I did a lot of soul-searching this weekend as we endured pounding in the villa upstairs (sigh). 

Why must crazy follow me? Whyyyy?

In any event, I realized I cannot get married unless we each have our own bedroom and bathroom. Close quarters and I are incompatible bedfellows. 

I just wish i were so decisive about what to be when I grow up. But I might have gotten an inch closer. 

Daily, I vascillate between being wildly uninspired after doing the same job for 10 years, and super-grateful for everything else. 

After all, I’ve done inspiring work with psychos (Pittsburgh comes to mind) and the only inspiration it gave me was to leave town. 

I didn’t come to any concrete epiphanies. It was more like I fear a pay cut if I change professions again. But maybe there’s more money to be made if I pursued my passions. Whatever those are these days. 

I heard someone say that she always assumed she would never make money as a writer. But she makes six figures on an average year. So, it’s possible to do what you love and never have to reintroduce your palate to ramen. 

I also read some affirmations about money. That abundance follows you and you have more than enough to get by and to help others. I liked that. After all, I have a chronic fear that everything goes away on a regular cycle. (I call that “experience.”) 

So that’s why I do the same thing for a decade.  I do love it, yes, but I still have a lot of storIes in me and I don’t want leave them untold. And I haven’t figured out how to do both yet. 

Emphasis on the “yet.” I’ll get there. Just as soon as I can. Whenever that will be. 

And that ain’t nothing compared to the adventures I have left in me. Even if I can only do them on the weekends.