I hear the crazies are still upstairs, slamming the doors and windows. Sigh. I saw all their ugly discarded furniture on the curb under the “no dumping” sign. With any luck, their bed is gone and they will go to it.
So hey it’s Halloween, yes? I was a cat in the morning and a bat for the night …
The rumble in the upstairs jungle lasted all day. At one point it sounded like Loser opened some packed boxes. Nae-Nae caught him and erupted like Mount Vesuvius. Per usual.
But now … Silence. It’s 10:30 and …nothing. No banging, no music, no f-bombs, no blubbering, no oil drums being rolled, no sliding-glass doors being slammed and no coffins being dragged along the floor.
That doesn’t mean it will stay calm. But, you know, the stillness is nothing short of miraculous.
I’ll still leave my tv on tonight anyway. Loud. They’ve fooled me before. I’m not taking any chances.
11 p.m — Spoke too soon. Stomping ahoy. And screaming. God damn it. It’s just another ordinary night. Carry on.
Just one day, you know? I want to not fall asleep to screaming and music, just one day. I want to not awaken to screaming and banging just one day. I want my nerves to not be shot for just one day.
This morning they’ve been up there dropping f-bombs and shouting “you move out” and “no you move out.”
Listen bitches. You are both moving out. Tomorrow. So get the fuck out, both of youse. Today if you could. That’d be great.
Lying in bed just like Brian Wilson did listening to Baby Who Cries Like Daddy howling.
Beats listening to Nae-Nae screaming at Big Giant Pussy about his “whore” like we were treated to yesterday. For hours.
Bitch keep droppin’ shit on mah ceiling. You’re out in three days, ho. You best be dropping it into cardboard boxes.
Toodles, twunt.
Apparently Thundercunt discovered that sweet, quiet, polite and giggling Lucy was at the hizzouse the other night. Because she came home yesterday and screamed the whole day. We even heard her tell Big Giant Pussy to get out again.
I’ve decided to call her Nae-Nae, after that horrible song with the lyric, “Watch me nae-nae (OK!).”
You’d think BGP would gladly separate from her. But I know men who left hideous women for sweet, wonderful, darling people like me. And then went right back to those who made them feel two inches tall and one inch long. Ahem.
In any event, less screaming and more packing, Nae-Nae.
I saw Big Giant Pussy today. He didn’t see me. I’ve been hoping to end this adventure without being in their line of sight.
After all, they aren’t taking responsibility for being horrid residents. They probably blame me for being one of the complainers about them.
I actually stopped calling the landlord, cops, security and the HOA after I realized A) all are useless and B) after I confronted them.
Perhaps I should have stayed on it, lest they could make the case that they’ve learned to behave. But I have zero plans to renew my lease and it doesn’t need to be my fight anymore.
However, I will be very happy if/when they remove their dirty doormat. And it is my dream that the place remains unrented for the remaining five months on my lease.
I’m tired of not asking and not receiving. I’m asking. Please grant me ongoing peace and health and wealth. Blessed be. Damn it.
Big Giant Pussy is upstairs blasting his music when he should be packing. And I am drinking Zinfandel straight out of the bottle, trying to calm my tattered nerves.
He sounds like he’s with a girl who doesn’t scream. They are even laughing. Hunh. Maybe it’s the “Lucy” Thundercunt told him to go to.
Lucy and Loser. It has a nice ring to it.
Please God, say Lucy didn’t take over the lease and we will still be subjected to Martin Loser King and Fraggle Rock.
In any event, today my happy moments came at Panera. Because, autumn squash soup. Also I bought an item that I returned and got a huge discount on the item I exchanged it for. Clearly the cashier made a mistake but she said just take it. And I did.
I feel like I have started the 100 Happy Days challenge. New nephew, new shoes, a discounted shirt and butternut squash soup. Not too shabby, universe. Thanks for being kind to me.
Also, 99% full moon …
Because who doesn’t love working till 12:30 a.m. and then having a Big Giant Pussy blubbering at 3:45 a.m. and then having brats beating on your ceiling at 6, just in time for you to get up and finish last night’s project?
It’s all good. Nothing can burst my bubble. I won’t let it.
I mean who could be cranky when they wake up to this beautiful sight?
Relative peace as I edit tonight. That’s all right by me.
I’ve been saying a new mantra, that money is coming my way from unexpected places. My great-uncle called tonight to say he’s sending mom a little money.
I’m certain it’s not going to be life-changing. He sold something of my grandfather’s and got a couple bucks that he felt she should have.
But still. Anything that doesn’t end with me spending money is a blessing.
