I’d love to say I got a good night’s sleep last night and I haven’t thought about leaving the planet once. But I’d be lying.
Awakened to Thundercunt telling Big Giant Pussy to leave, at top volume of course. He told her to keep the furniture and she said to keep the kids. He left for a while but now he’s back.
I don’t wish I were dead. I wish they were.
As for the traffic ticket last night …
I drive slow. Anyone will tell you that. My car is a piece of shit. Mom is in excruciating, untreated pain. I don’t fuck around with speed when they are both falling apart.
I also live in a community filled with lakes and ducks that we feed. I get violently angry when people don’t let the ducks cross the street. Fucking wait for ten goddamned seconds, I always think when people are in my backseat as I let our little friends walk at their own little speed.
So for me to get a ticket from a lying jackass who said I blew a stop sign, well, fuckyouverymuch. I hate beach cops more than I hate my upstairs neighbors. Perfectly useless.
There was a local story recently, where one of these beach cops gave a lady a $600 ticket and she said she’s not surprised that police get shot.
Now while I would never say it myself, I admit I thought it.
Instead I just said thank you (i.e., for not killing me and my mom or for making the cost any higher than it was). And I wondered how people who are so cruel and terrible in this world skate through unscathed, and I feel like people like us have to pay the price out of a financial and emotional piggy bank that’s not filled enough to handle it.
I always tell myself it could be worse. And then it keeps getting worse. Do I have to say it could be better and maybe it would get better?