Humph.

Mommy's making sausage-stuffed mushrooms and a taco ring for a potluck dinner tonight at my deadbeat daddy's house. Bitch hasn't cooked since the last time we had guests at our old apartment (we used to have a lot of guests, though! But then again, they were mostly 'overnight' guests 'cuz Mommy's a hoe-biscuit), and do you think she's even letting me sample anything? Not that I even like beef, but I felt like I should record it for posterity that, after days of having no food in the house, Mommy cooked!!! Go, asshole!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, GRANDMA!!!!