Bad Cat

Mommy has been calling me her Bad Little Cat since we arrived in Pittsburgh on Thursday. Late that evening, she and Daddy went to Pegasus, the only gay dance club in the city, where they used to hang out all the time. Anyway, when they rolled in during the wee hours of the morning, they were very upset to find that I had knocked over Grampy's little glass-and-wrought-iron table where he eats his meals. Fuck them -- did anybody think to ask if I were OK? Hell no. Selfish bastards.

What had happened was that Daddy had given Grandma a pretty pink rose, which she had put in a pink vase in the middle of this table. Well, I was hanging out on the arm of the couch, and I wanted to eat the rose, so I leaned on the glass tabletop, which for some reason could not support my 16 pounds of girth, and it went crashing to the floor. Oops. The wrought-iron stand even went ass-over-teacups, and the water from the vase went everywhere. Mommy was pissed off because Grampy's pills for the morning all got melted by the water, not to mention the fact that the stack of bills on the table were ruined. It's not like Mommy pays her own bills -- I'm allowed to poop all over them, if I so choose, 'cause she just throws them away anyway.

Grandma said she heard the table crash, but she didn't bother checking on me. I guess her Valium kicked in quite nicely. Mommy put the table back together completely wrong and had to prop up one side of it with a stack of paper towels so the thing wouldn't rock. hee hee. All this happened after I went and hid in my favorite spot -- behind the TV-atop-a-TV. Only this time, Grandma didn't move the TVs so Mommy could yank me out. Mommy was pretty damn clever, actually, as she left a trail of turkey leading out from behind the TVs into the living room. When I followed the path-o-meat, Grandma surrounded the TVs with boxes of kitty litter and bags of cat food so that I could not squirm my furry little ass back there again. Damn, these girls are good. I will have to figure out a new way to challenge them to keep me out when I go back for the December holidays. :)

Yawn. Off to the closet-top for a nap! See how cute I am when I yawn. ...