Cat tales

I wish all cats were as joyous to have around as me. Mommy had a bad nightmare last night in which she had to get out of a house with a gas leak, but she couldn't find Kadi and me and she had to leave without us. She was dreaming that she lost us forever, and I could hear her sobbing, so I crawled up on her and snoozed on her side until she woke up. She petted me right away and thanked me for coming over to her right then. I felt like a good cat.

But I have two bad cat stories (none of which involve me). The other night, Mommy was lying on the couch (probably playing with herself -- she has more kitty toys than I do!), and Kadi went to use the couch as a scratching post, like she always does. Well, Kadi missed the couch and got Mommy's arm instead, and she gave her a big bloody four-inch gash right above her elbow. Of course, Mommy didn't stop what she was doing, but when she was done, she had more than one mess to clean up, so to speak!

Aunt Angie's cat Jupiter mauled the hell out of her the other day. Aunt Angie was sittin' on the toilet, readin' a magazine (wink wink, nudge nudge) when Jupiter was on the bathroom sink at their house. Jupiter decided to try to step onto the back of the toilet (Mommy won't let us do that), but he's a big fatty boombalatty and lost his balance. So he dug his claws into Aunt Angie's back and slid down to the floor. Angie had two big, bloody scratches running the whole length of her back. Mommy woulda killed me for less than that! These humans need to get those kitties declawed!!!