Chitty chitty bum bum

"Fe fi fo fum
I smell a big, fat furry bum."

My asshole Mommy was dead asleep last night, and I was curled up next to her because it is very cold in our bedroom and she is not nice enough to let me under the covers. As it is, there is a blanket of my fur on top of the dark-blue comforter, and that pisses her off, too.

Anyway, I scooched my ass a little closer to her head and flipped my tail up in the air. At which time, she smelled my stinky ass and it awakened her. Very sleepily, she sang the above song -- thinking she was funny, of course. I hate how quickly she thinks this shit up, even in her sleep!

In related news, my birthday is coming up in April. I am hoping Mommy does not see this website, because a kitty does NOT need a costume!!!

I'm gonna go hide lest she try to dig the shit out of my ass. *poof*