And we wonder why I’m not married

Things that have come out of my mouth in the last 12 hours:

“Be the man you want me to believe you can be.”

“Coffee, a muscle relaxer and some eternal sunshine.” — What I need to recover from this past weekend.

“I’m just a girl in a bar.” (Hat-tip to Meredith Grey.)

Well, actually, my version was, “I’m just a girl in a bar, and I like to leave the boys there when I go.”

“Where’s the man who lights my soul on fire? Because everyone else in the meantime is Just Not Him.”

And as Mom said:

“Dating is hard. I mean, who really gives a shit what he wants on his bread?”

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