Caterwauling

I’m always looking for signs, but the only ones I’ve found today clearly say “STOP.”

My iTunes turned itself on today so very randomly and started playing Brandi Carlile’s “Before it Breaks.”

My spirit guides are nothing if not mischievous, and clearly technologically talented as well, so I tried to figure out what the song message meant for me.

“I’m all right, don’t I always seem to be?
Am I swinging on the stars
Don’t I wear them on my sleeves
But when you’re looking for a crossroads
It happens every day, and whichever way you turn
I‘m gonna turn the other way.”

Hmm. Could apply to any number of situations. Moving on…

I got picked up twice tonight. I’m always on the lookout for a tall, dark and handsome millionaire. (Hey, in my neighborhood, you can always hit two out of three, and the most-common trait is “millionaire.”)

I was just trying to walk on the beach for a few minutes — my meditation time, on the rare occasion I get out of the castle — and this yahoo walks with me for a friggin’ mile. *stabbitystabstab* Well, he was from France, so I guess he wasn’t a total yahoo. But after he asked me if I like kids and I said I hate them and he opens his phone and SHOWS ME his kids, I was all, “Dealbreaker!”

I tried the whole “I’m unemployed and my mom has lived with me for FIVE WHOLE YEARS” line. Since it’s true and all. It didn’t scare him away. Somebunny was clearly hot to trot. And this twat was NOT.

He said I need a good man. That all men need a good woman and all women need a good man. At this point, I’ve already had my space encroached upon and I’m steaming, so I said, “Know any?”

*airplane joke. wooosh!*

Finally lost him, although he probably followed me home. *twitch* And I won’t even dedicate any space to the next one, Sammy the Sleazeball at the pier who slimes all over me every time he sees me. *huz*

I want nothing more than to meet Mr. Right. But God’s really gotta stop testing me with everybody else. (I did silently ask Him whether He was enjoying my discomfort. I think He was!)

“Say it’s over, say I’m dreamin’
Say I’m better than you left me
Say you’re sorry, I can take it
Say you’ll wait, say you won’t
Say you love me, say you don’t
I can make my own mistakes
And learn to let it bend before it breaks.”

This entry was posted on Monday, May 23rd, 2011 at 8:23 PM and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.