Caterwauling

So I walked into Reagan National early Tuesday morning, luggage in tow, to the America West counter.

It was one of those rare occasions in which I wanted to deal with a real, live human at the ticket counter. But I suppose I should have defined human.

Anywho, I got into line — I was first, behind two people at the electronic ticket dispenser Because I had a minute, I grabbed my wallet and yanked out my driver’s license in one fluid motion. I say this because some jerkoff walked up to the side of the counter and got serviced RIGHT AWAY while I waited. Me? Not happy.

One of the machines opened up, and this little man who CLEARLY had short-man syndrome snarled at me to go to it already. So I lugged my bags up to it, whereupon it promptly told me that I couldn’t check in because you can only check in eight hours or fewer, prior to your flight. Seeing as though my flight was leaving in, oh, an HOUR, this was Not Good.

So I asked the Sniveling Little Shit to help me. He acted like I had just eaten his breakfast and stormed out to show me what I’d done wrong. Which was nothing because I’m not a goddamned moron, so he had to check me in himself, which took all of 60 seconds.

Meanwhile, a guy came up to the next machine and it gave him a whole different type of error. So when the Sniveling Little Shit snuck out from behind the big, bad counter, I didn’t really see him.

The thing is, I have this one suitcase that literally takes all of my might to lift. It’s for suits and stuff, and there’s so much hardware and so damn many zippers that the thing is heavy without any clothes in it. Shove in a few dozen yards of clothing, and yay carpal tunnel.

Anyway, I totally did not plan this, but when I gathered up all my strength and hoisted that big-ass suitcase into the air, I (accidentally, I promise!) HIT the Sniveling Little Shit and sent him FLYING across the aisle! Hah!

Oh, to see his legs going in opposite directions warmed my frosty little heart that day. I sort of choked out a half-assed, “Sorry!” before scooting away to hand over my bags to security.

All told, I wasn’t the ONLY one flying that day! 😉

This entry was posted on Monday, December 19th, 2005 at 9:35 PM and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.