High Infidelity
“Do you really want to know where I was April 29th?
Do I really have to chart the constellations in his eyes?”
Happy High Infidelity day to those who celebrate!
Had a bad night. I mean, a BAD NIGHT. Ran over to my cat feeding friend’s house at 2 a.m. to leave all kinds of stuff on her porch.
I mean, she said she’s feeding at 4 a.m., right?
The place was dark. And she replied … 12 hours later at 2 p.m. to say thanks. Which tells me that’s when she woke up.
So sorry, kitties. I’ve clearly forsaken you. Christ, if you have to rely on her, forget it.
I think I fell asleep around 5 a.m. — there is NO WAY I would have gotten up at 6, anyway. I mean, I WOULD have. And if someone harassed me, they would have probably been dead meat. Or I would have been.
You see, I was a debutante in another life
But now I seem to be scared to go outside.”
That’s the limbo I live in. Someone is going to get hurt, and it’s usually me.
Speaking of me feeling like shit, I had three very good ideas today. My colleague agreed to one, so yay.
The other ideas relied on the big boss being on board. Which, he was like no I have too much to do right now.
He always says no right away. I promise you, give it a week and he’ll come to ME with a GREAT IDEA that sounds like mine. And I’ll say that’s AWESOME; I know JUST the way to execute on it!
But then middle boss says to me to go figure out something else.
What, I should grow some dangly bits?
(ETA: I have an alternate idea for one. I also have 47 other priorities so we’ll see if it’s worth it to have delayed all of those time-sensitive things for this.)
I’ve never gotten a single atta girl or great idea or go with that or I believe in you from this one. Anything I say, even if it is echoing something he said to me in the past, is something to be challenged.
“If I were the man
I’d be THE MAN.
When I got fired from the last company, they brought in a guy named Aaron to take my place.
I mean, they really wanted a marketer. So they got a marketer.
Also he has dangly bits. Which only could have helped my cause there.
Aaron just told them to go suck wind and he went back to his prior job. (Yes!) Like I was able to do. Interesting parallel.
There’s another Aaron who just resigned from his job. I freaking helped him build his new company and when I needed a job, he fucked me. So he can fuck all the way off.
Anyway, he is now taking a sabbatical. (Must be nice.) And we heard some dude is taking his place.
There’s a woman who’s worked there AND at the predecessor company (where I worked, which is how I knew what worked/didn’t so he could work around it).
My friend says, why doesn’t this woman step up and be the publisher?
I said for the same reason I will never have the publisher job. Dangly Bits.
As in, you can’t see mine. So, let’s find someone who has visible ones.
“You know there’s many different ways
That you can kill the one you love
The slowest way is never loving them enough.”
Welp. That was my April 29th.