In my head
In thinking (briefly) about travel plans, I realize I actually have to tell people I’m evaporating for a couple days.
The worst part is I have no problem with the reaction to what evil deeds I will likely be up to, but rather with the Hearing About It that I could catch Ebola or the enterovirus.
I grew up in an age where you’d rather hear you were knocked up than have an STD. These days it’s more preferable to hear you have an STD rather than killer explosive diarrhea.
Somebody get me a bedazzled surgical mask and allow me to go into denial for a little while …